What the heck?

This is exactly what I said on Sunday when I finally got the butterfly bandages off my boob.. You may wonder why I said WHAT THE HECK? It is because I went in thinking I had a LUMPECTOMY.. Meaning a little area, about 1-1.5 inch incision, TOPS! I couldnt believe the GASH that was staring back at me in my bathroom mirror.. Mind you, taking off any bandage after this ONE DAY SURGERY was just about worse than the surgery,itself..When I took off the initial dressing, I kid you not, I had to go sit by the toilet because I thought I was going to puke..I never did.. But I was really hurting!!!
Ok.. so about the GASH.. It measured 3 inches.. Thats about 2x the size I was expecting.. NO WONDER I AM IN SO MUCH FRIGGIN PAIN!!!!!!!!! I saw the doctor yesterday for my post surgical visit..He said it was all healing ok but that I had some redness in the area and that he wanted me to take some antibiotics, just so infection wouldnt settle in.. INFECTION? UUGGHHHH.. So, Im taking antibiotics now..
I asked the doc why my incision was so big.. He told me that it was very deep and in order to get it all, they had to take a pretty big CHUNK out.. He told me that they removed a 9cm x 6cm x 3cm section.. I was wondering if I had any boob left.. I do.. But anyway, no wonder I feel like crap! I had a modified mastectomy almost! GEEZ!!!!! I am still hurting, BTW.. I am wondering when this will end... Hey, Atleast Im cancer free! I guess thats a positive I can look at!