Friday, June 27, 2008

Ok-- My Kid Rock Story..

A few years back, Kid Rock came to the Amphitheater here in Pelham.. I am a HUGE fan of his music.. Not too much of his language in his songs, but the music is great.. He has his own sound.. And I LOVE it.. Anyway, back in those days, it was around 2001, which now seems like EONS ago.. I was a divorced single mom with 3 kids ages 5,8 and 12.. I was friends with this other single mom who's son played on a t-ball team with my youngest.. She was also a huge fan.. She had a friend, who I was also an aquaintance with, that was a huge fan.. She was about to go through a divorce so I guess she was wanting to get out and relax with some girls and see an awesome concert..

My friend got us FREE tickets.. I was sooooo excited! I got all dressed up in my MOM outfit of shorts and a "mock" sleeveless turtleneck.. It was summer..I wasnt dressed up or anything, just very casual and mom-ish.. Ok.. Someone did NOT leave me a memo letting me know that you dont dress like a mom when you are going out with the girls to a KID ROCK concert.. I met my friend at her house and when she answered the door, I about fell out! She was wearing a halter top that barely held her boobs in and a pair of LEATHER pants! What the heck? She was dressed like she was a backup dancer for Kid Rock.. And Ill be honest.. She looked AWESOME.. She had the body to pull it off greatly...

Umm.. I did NOT.. So, Im sitting there in my little stupid SLEEVELESS MOCK TURTLENECK SWEATER and shorts looking at BEST, average.. And I am sitting next to Pamela Lee..Seriously.. I could have atleast been showing some cleavage or something.. LOL We picked met our other friend and got in her car..This was where I started feeling a little OUT OF PLACE..SHE was wearing a pair of leather snakeskin pants and a skin tight tank top..She , too, looked great in it.. I was trying to figure out how these single moms looked so good.. I was JEALOUS! LOL

So, here we were, MOMMY and her Back Up Dancers!! I was laughing and crying inside all at the same time.. Boy, did I stand out.. Or was it THEM that stood out? Either way, I just didnt fit.. So, we go to the concert and when I get there, I see a Pelham Police Officer that I knew.. The look on his face pretty much said it all.. Who are THOSE women? Those women are MOMS from the Homewood Ball Park.. Im sure he was wanting to come watch a few ballgames in Homewood.. LOL

We were walking to where we stood to watch the concert and a guy walks by and pretty much falls over his tongue as he gawks at the BOOB show.. One girl says " UGGHHH.. I dont understand why they have to STARE".. LOL HUH? Did I miss something? Sweetie, they STARE because you are falling out of your haltertop.. GEEZ..

We walked over to the stage and the back up dancers started flirting with a stage hand.. He was intrigued.. So, afterward, he let all 3 of us backstage.. I was SO EXCITED!! We were backstage, hobknobbing with all the band members.. I called my kids on a cell phone just to BRAG.. hehe.. They were so mad at me!! That was about the time when Kid Rock's percussionist, a woman, told one of the backup dancer moms that she " had the biggest breasts I have EVER seen"... UUGGHHHHHHHHHHHH Am I in HELL? That was when we went outside.. I am just taking a guess here, but I think his drummer was a lesbian.. Or she could have just been making an observation..Either way, the boob show became very uncomfortable and wanted to leave.. That was when we became friendly with another band member that let us all into a room where the band members unwind..This was where Kid Rock was..

I walked in, in my sleeveless mock turtleneck sweater and shorts, with the boob show and there he was..He was a skinny guy.. But he was EXTREMELY polite.. He even called me and the boob show "Ma'am" We both died.. lol He introduced himself as "Bobby".. I told him that my 5 year old loved him but he was only allowed to listen to EDITED versions.. LOL He thought that was cute.. Seriously.. Todd used to sit on a rocking horse at the YMCA when he was 4 and sing "Imma cowboy babyyyyyyyyyyyyy" .. so cute!!

We got to sit and hang with them for about 20 minutes.. I met Uncle Kracker too..Of course, he introduced himself as "Matt".. I was on a REAL NAME BASIS with them.. We were tight! LOL Anyway, we left and then went out on the town to a few dance places.. Of course, thats what backup dancers do, after they go to concerts..

Talk about a fish out of water.. Highlight of that portion of the night? When we tried to get into a dance place on Southside, I cant remember the name.. But anyway, you had to pay to get in.. One of the backup dancers told them that we all worked at SAMMY'S.. You know.. SAMMY'S, the STRIP CLUB..

SAMMY'S? REALLY? Ya think I REALLY look like I work there.. Um no.. I looked at the girl behind the counter and shook my head "Yes" and followed them in.. LOL Talk about a night!


Leigh said...

Oh my goodness. We I guess you know that boobs got the pass backstage. But I too would have been very uncomfortable. Thats just me.

Michelle said...

I was like a fish out of water! LOL It didnt matter.. I guess I used her boobs to meet Kid Rock and Uncle Kracker.. LOL The whole "we work at Sammy's" was what made me laugh so hard.. geez.. I REALLY dont look the part..

HEWY said...

LOL!!!!!! You're killing me!

Charnita's Xpressions said...

I LOVE this story.
Should take a boob show to the next concert I go to - maybe I can meet JBJ!!!!